The Journey of a Thousand Miles Often Ends at Mile Marker 2

"Nothing worth doing is easy." "If it wasn't hard, everybody would do it." "Hard work will pay off in the end." "Some people dream of success... others work for it."

Any of those sound familiar? Yeah, I thought as much. And at the beginning of every project, we feel inspired. Motivated. We believe that, "Hey, yeah! I can do this! Heck, they'll probably write a movie about this. I'll at least get an invitation on Oprah!" 

If only that good feeling would last! If only, everyday, we woke up feeling good and excited about the prospect of positive change. That we really will finally learn why the Great Gatsby is so great; we will learn how to play Mary Had a Little Lamb on the black keys and the white keys on the piano; we will go from couch potato to a 5k runner; that we will stop smoking/drinking/eatinganythingeveragainwithfat. And we make it through the first day, thinking about how it actually feels pretty darn good! Sure I have shin splints/am literally shaking from giving up nicotine/realize that I could just watch the movie and learn why Mr. Gatsby is so awesome - but, damnit, we made it! Through the first day.

And the truth is, you will likely last one day. Heck, maybe a whole week! But regardless of how long you actually make it, let me tell you something: you will hit a wall, and you will want to stop. My New Year's Resolution for 2011 was to get fit and lose weight. I've been open about that, and it's now April and I am still sticking to it. But let me tell you, I saw that wall. And it was huge. Monstrous. It made the Great Wall of China look tiny. I was praying that Ronald Reagan would miraculously appear and say, "Ms. Jenson! Tear down this wall!" 

But he didn't. There was no hunky construction worker around to operate a crane with one of those big cement ball thingies and at least put a tiny hole in that wall so I could see through the other side. I wanted to build a ladder out of Dove bars and peanut butter pretzels to help me get over it. No such luck. 

I was discouraged and tired. I knew I had been doing an awesome job, but I was sick of counting calories and foregoing evening TV for pushups and jumping jacks. Change just wasn't happening fast enough, and I was sick of being the health conscious, vitamin popping, "Oh-my-gosh-I-don't-eat-that-kind-of-food" person. It's just not me, I tried to convince myself. Finally, after gaining 2 pounds in a matter of 5 days, I realized I couldn't quit. I absolutely couldn't. I had come this far, and to turn back now would be to admit defeat.

Finally, I used every ounce of strength in my boot camp toned legs and kicked a big giant hole in that overwhelming brick and cement wall.  I climbed through it, breathed a sigh of relief, and I kept moving forward. 

I have lost 30 - okay, 28 (I rounded up, so sue me!) - pounds. I can do 25 boy pushups. I am stronger and fitter and downright hotter.

I look forward to seeing mile marker 1000. And then I'm going to eat a whole pint of full fat Haagen Dazs. With whipped cream. And hot fudge. Maybe some French fries, too. Oh, and buy a slinky bikini. But probably not in that order. 

Forgive me as I leave you with this cliche

Lessons from The Little Engine That Could

When I get to the gym, I immediately set my Pandora radio station to “Lady Gaga” and prepare to rock out to the likes of Katy Perry, Fergie, and of course Madame Gaga for the next 45 minutes. Sound familiar?

Here’s a semi-funny piece of information about me, though: If I’ve really turned up the resistance on my machine, am running and my lungs feel like they’re about to explode, or just need a little extra workout pick me up, I immediately turn on “Eye of the Tiger.” I picture myself with big 80's bangs and perfect blue eyeshadow, training alongside Rocky himself, and together we run up the Capitol steps. In that vision, I am awesome. I am a fitness guru, clad in neon bicycle shorts and a leotard. I run circles around Olivia Newton John. I make Jane Fonda look bad. (random tidbit: in that vision I can also sing, but that's because I like to imagine my life as a cheesy 80's music video) 

Back to reality: I am out of breath, the music is only playing in my ears, and I should NOT be wearing neon bicycle shorts. I listen to the song. I dig deep. I channel the energy of The Little Engine That Could: “I think I can, I think I can.” There are times when it takes every little piece of strength, mental and physical, to finish the rep, to lift the weight, to keep moving my legs even though I feel they’re about to collapse beneath me. I tell myself I can do it. I tell myself that I am strong and powerful and woman and awesome and that yes, like the infamous little engine, I CAN do it.

Use this little guy as inspiration!

A little reminder to myself and my 7 readers: nobody ever did anything by starting with the belief that they couldn’t. Stacey Allison didn’t look at Mount Everest and said, “Eh, probably can’t.” Jack LaLanne never said, “I’ll likely drown.” And from today forward, I will only speak in positives. I most definitely can.

So dig deep, push through, channel your own energy, and think that you can do it. You may just surprise yourself. 

Boot Camp: YOU CAN DO IT!

Last night, I went to Boot Camp. I thought I was going to die. But I did it.

Maybe it wasn't this bad... but it kinda felt like it! Although, the trainers were much prettier.

Last night’s 1-hour routine was:

1)      Run ½ mile.

2)      30 second intervals of “high knee” running and jumping jacks for 10 minutes

3)      Interval training

a.       Round #1:

                                                               i.      1 minute of jump squats on the BOSU balance ball

                                                             ii.      1 minute of bicep curls

                                                            iii.      1 minute tricep curls

Repeat 3x. Do 24 Pushups.

b.      Round #2:

                                                               i.      1 minute of sitting up and down with a 12 lb weight on a BOSU balance ball

                                                             ii.      1 minute of “mountain running” (putting your head and hands down on the bench and essentially switching your feet back and forth as quickly as possible)

                                                            iii.      1 minute of ab work

Repeat 3x.

Streeeeeeeeeeeetch. Ohmygoodness. 

Tips to surviving boot camp: I am NO EXPERT! I’ve been a grand total of… 5 times. But as people have fainted/thrown up during boot camp (including my poor lovely friend Amy – sorry girl!), here are some things I’ve learned from my trainer Tina in order to make it through:

1.      AN I-CAN-DO-IT ATTITUDE! This is absolutely the most important aspect. I went a few times last year, but I kept feeling discouraged because it was so hard. Here’s what I’ve learned: It’s supposed to be hard!! But an understanding that you won’t “get it” the very first time – or even the first few times – coupled with a good attitude and a willingness to improve will get you through it. You will be running with the best of them (I even made it through the whole ½ mile – sadly, that’s actual progress for me!)

Look to this iconic woman for inspiration!!

2.       DRINK WATER! Amy learned this lesson the hard way. Drink water throughout the day, during boot camp, and afterwards. Dehydration is a real possibility when you’re working your body this hard. Not to mention, not drinking enough water can result in sore muscles. So, drink water!

3.       EAT LUNCH! Boot camp will work your body. It’s supposed to. Even if you’re on a diet, you need to eat something substantial beforehand (of course, not immediately before – you may feel queasy!) Yesterday I ate fish, brown rice and avocado for lunch, approximately 6 hours before exercising. I'd recommend eating a banana or complex carbohydrate granola bar an hour or so beforehand as well. But, I was fine, albeit hungry afterwards. Eat complex carbohydrates and lean meats.

Wish me luck for Wednesday! In case you wanted to know, I’m down 18 pounds. Perhaps boot camp will help speed up the progress? J

Readers: feel free to comment! Tell me about your boot camp experiences or any other exercise tips you might have. Are there certain foods that help you? Any high fiber, high protein meals that you like? Tell me! 

I Am Woman, Hear Me... Cry?

I am painfully human. Scratch that. I am painfully woman. I watch the Notebook over and over and I cry every time. I hate spiders. I turn to Haagen-Dazs and peanut butter cups in my time of need. I collect shoes and go totally Lady Gaga over the newest fashions. I have a closet full of clothes, and constantly feel, “I have nothing to wear.” And, sadly, as a woman, I allow myself to engage in a cycle of self-abuse.

DO NOT FEAR! I’m not crazy, and I won’t be visiting the school therapist to prescribe me some Zoloft. No, my dear readers, that is not the case. What I do is this: I stand in front of the mirror, pick myself apart, and bully myself until my nose is red and my eyes are watery. This sounds… Zoloft worthy, doesn’t it? But it’s not! It’s what we women do. We are taught to do it. We even engage in contests with our friends of who can say the worst things about themselves.

Friend #1: I hate my thighs. They are so jiggly!
Friend #2: OMG, no! I have the hugest thighs. Plus, I’m totally broken out right now. Gross.
Friend #1: At least you have boobs.
Friend #3: You are both crazy. I need to immediately lose 20 pounds, defrizz my hair, and figure out some way to magically reduce the size of my giant nose.
. . . etc.

Have you ever had this conversation? You know you have. You know you have. And I’m willing to bet that, aside from Samantha Jones, you’ve never heard a woman (even one who you think is “perfect”) pronounce, “I love my body!” Instead, we pick on ourselves, telling ourselves that “we could be so pretty IF…!” We compare ourselves to those who seem to have better hair, a cuter nose, a firmer butt, flatter abs, until we have no choice but to feel inadequate. And we think that this is normal. You know what? It is the norm. But it doesn’t have to be.

Today I went to the gym (and burned 870 calories, according to the little calorie reader – go me!) and I looked around at the dozen or so women exercising. I thought about how each of them were beautiful, and how I absolutely adore strong, confident women. As they exercised, they all looked strong and confident – the little old lady with the toner sneakers next to me and the perm, who kicked upping the incline on her 2.5 mph treadmill; the 13-year-old brunette who kept mouthing the words along to her iPod, while wearing her school basketball shorts; the middle-aged Latina woman with no makeup,  laugh lines around her lips, and an inspiring look of determination. I love the way my mom looks when she comes back from a long run – so strong and healthy and positively glowing. Those women are beautiful. And I’m willing to bet that, at some point, they have all remarked on their need for “improvement.”

So today, I make a pact: with myself, with my friends, my mom, my sister, my cousins, my aunts, my grandmothers, with all women –

•          I will not disparage myself. I will look myself in the mirror and remind myself that, in the words of John Mayer, “I am bigger than my body gives me credit for.” And by bigger, I mean that I am bigger in the very best sense – my heart, my mind, my soul, my need to dance to and sing along with every song that comes on the radio. I will accept compliments with grace and ease, instead of the usual, incredulous, "Really? I'm totally having a fat day." 
•          I will not allow those around me to disparage themselves. I will remind you that you are beautiful and that you are loved, and that no amount of exercising and dieting will change the fact.
•         I will love myself. When Mark Darcy told Bridget Jones that, “I love you. Just the way you are,” every woman in the audience swooned. Let’s all be Mark Darcys to our very own Bridget Jones – let’s love ourselves, just the way we are.
•          I will take care of myself. I will not wallow in a sea of tears and ice cream. I will exercise. I will eat whole grains and lean meats. And yes, sometimes, I will eat cupcakes. I will enjoy the heck out of that cupcake. And then I will exercise.

So, to you apple-bottomed, big nosed, frizzy-haired, small-boobed, big boobed, curvy, skinny, sexy and beautiful women, stand with me and pronounce:

I AM WOMAN, HEAR ME CRY ROAR!!

I leave you with just a few pics of my beautiful friends and family, all whom I love, just the way they are. 

My law school friends: as brainy as they are beautiful, and stylish to boot (don't you just love Amy's lipstick color?)

My little Mom: A marathoner. A master chef. With perfect skin. I have great genes. 

Liz, proving that blondes can be just as smart and powerful as anybody! And yes, she cooks, too. 

My Grandma and Grandpa: 55 years married and in LOVE!  What's more beautiful than that? I just love the chocolate on her face!

The super sexy Jo Ann: with rosy cheeks and Megan Fox-esque lips. She'll dance circles around you in 4" pumps without even breaking a sweat. 

The lovely Nina: she cooks and bakes up a storm, rocks at the craft table, and does it all in complete and total girly style. And check out that hair!

Aren't they gorge?

This is me: I'm kinda funny.

(Hopefully) Helpful Tips from a Yo-Yo Dieter

I am -15 pounds sexier than I was a month ago. And the thing is, my first thought was, “Well, I reached 15 pounds, but I’ve still got another 35 to go.” I was… disappointed. Disappointed that I’ve spent the last 5 weeks tracking every bite I’ve eaten, exercising 5x per week, and I’m still at the beginning stages of this journey. And then, I changed that. I reminded myself that the exercise and dieting is paying off – I feel better, my clothes fit better, I look better! All good things. Which made me think about how important and vital it is to be both psychologically AND physiologically prepared for this journey. With absolutely no arrogance or pretention or disillusionment into believing that I am some sort of fitness guru (I’ve still got 35 lbs to go, after all!), here are some tips to real success for us “real girl” yo-yo dieters (disclaimer: this is primarily written as a reminder for myself).

1)      YOU DO HAVE WILLPOWER. I’ve always kinda believed that “willpower” is one of those things that you’re either born with or not born with – not unlike those blessed with Cleopatra-like eyelashes. I’ve always been envious of both groups. I’m only just starting to come to terms that I can’t make my eyelashes magically grow to Kardashian lengths. BUT – I have realized that I, yes I, Rachal Jenson, yo-yo dieter extraordinaire, do have willpower. Willpower, my friends, is like a muscle. The more you exercise it, the stronger it gets. Just like once upon a time, I struggled at doing 10 girly pushups, I’ve strengthened my lats and delts and now I can pound out 15 pushups (still breaking a sweat, mind you – but dammit, I can do them!). And, once upon a time, I heard every piece of bread/cake/French fry calling my name – and don’t get me wrong, they still call my name. But I flex my willpower muscle, and I resist (almost all the time).

2)      CELEBRATE EVERY ACHIEVEMENT. This is a hard one. It really is. It sounds easy, but it’s not. Raise your hand if you’ve ever said to yourself, “I’ll feel confident when I lose __ pounds” or “I’ll celebrate when I reach __ pounds.” Raise your hand – you know you’ve done that. Okay, well I’ve done that. I do that all the time. But here’s the problem – when you do that, you set yourself up for failure, because every time you weigh yourself and you discover that you’re not at your final end goal, you feel discouraged. You feel like quitting. You think, “I’ll never make it, so what’s the point?” Rethink that statement. Seriously – rethink it. Cliché as it may be, everything we do that is worthwhile is hard. And it takes hard work. If we celebrate only when we’ve reached the end, and don’t take time to “stop and smell the roses” along the way, we will be fraught with disappointment and heartache. Will I love myself more when I get my JD? Absolutely not. Do I celebrate every A? Of course!! The principle applies to weight loss too. We can’t wait until the end to congratulate ourselves and beam with pride – celebrate your successes. Every time you grab a piece of fruit instead of a scoop of Haagen-Dazs; when you up the resistance on your elliptical; when you do sit-ups while watching TV. Whatever it is, note it and be proud of yourself for making the right decisions. Because it is a series of these good decision that will bring you your ultimate success.

3)      SPLURGE SOMETIMES. Here’s a common situation: You’ve been good all week, heck, all month, and you go out to dinner. The “healthy” thing on the menu just doesn’t sound anywhere near as tasty as the cream-covered goodness that the person sitting across from you is about to order. You cave. You order the cream-covered goodness…  and gosh darn it, a side of butter smothered potatoes, too. And the cheese filled puff pastry thing. And the fried chocolate moussey buttery thing for dessert. It tastes so good.  Until you go home, realize you just consumed 5,000 calories, and feel like total crap. Feel like you should give up because, “Hey, I’ve blown it anyway.” If I can be so presumptuous, let me tell you something: One meal does not a diet break. Yes, it was a huge meal. Yes, it was incredibly indulgent and delicious and full of butter and carbs and cream. Did you enjoy it? Good for you! That meal is over, move on. You’ve had your slice of cake – leave the rest of the cake for another time. Don’t wallow in the guilt. Thank God that you have the opportunity to splurge, savor the taste, and make a dinner reservation a few weeks from that date to enjoy creamy, buttery foods again. One unhealthy meal does not a diet break.

4)      LOVE WHO YOU ARE TODAY. Okay, that sounds lame. But I totally mean it. One of the best compliments I ever got was, “No matter where you are or what you’re wearing, you always look confident.” And the reason is, I think, I do try to be happy with who I am today. Not that I couldn’t be better – if I could immediately lose the next 35 pounds (okay, 40), grow 6 more inches of hair, have perma-blonde highlights, immediately graduate and pass the bar, all while rocking a 4-carat wedding ring while perusing dream homes with my realtor and wearing a DVF wrap dress and 4” Jimmy Choos that never hurt my feet… I would. But that isn’t me. My feet hurt after wearing 4” heels too long, I have 35 (okay, 40!) pounds to go, I’m getting dark roots in my hair, and I’m pretty darn scared of graduating and taking the bar. Here’s what I DO have: 5 successful semesters of law school under my belt, a one-of-a-kind bohemian glam (well I think it’s one-of-a-kind anyway!!) style, shiny hair, one big cute dimple, and an awesome family and friends who love me… even when I wear weird things and even though I have 35 40 pounds to go. And those things make me love myself, and I know that it’s okay, but not preferable, that I’m not at my goal weight yet. I am who I am, and I like it. No, scratch that. I LOVE it.

And with that, I return to my Progresso Lite Chicken Noodle Soup before getting my booty kicked at the gym today. Yes, I will be congratulating myself on those things. Go Rachal.